alas

" chew yi ling, you now can be promote....."

this kind of word made me cried. indeed. don't know why.. more than words cant be to describe my feeling at the moment when i checking my account balance. some how? i acted funny when i checking my account balance. shutting everything out of me.

that day, i worked. after a half day work, i required 5 mins break from my boss. heart keep pounding, hand shaking, empty mind and a half fragile heart with me ,i went in to atm machine central for taking a glance on my account balance to see whatever i can be promote into year 2 onot.? ""the balance..."

"the balance...."

"can i be promote????" shivering... praying... god bless me..

rm 19XX.XX",

when the total balance appeared on the monitor,

the first impression on my mind was " that maybe have something wrong with the machine. since that no body was queue , so that i decided to check once again.

so blissful. the machine didn't lie. it showed the same balance. some tear flooded in eyes. the first action i did was jumped and screamed inwardly. well, fortunately no body was there. so , i walked out to continue my job.

but, i walked back into the central after "3 seconds".

Meanwhile, i noticed an old man looking at me, strangely. " why this girl walking in again????" ....???? i can see this question slipped into his brain. moreover, the world hidden a lot of bad guy, so i stared at him back with my "big big eyes" and sent out the message" dont look at me or i will kill you" . soon , he alerted. maybe, he received my message lox. then, he gone. wahaaa!!!!!!!!! please gag^^

the reason i went back to the atm machine it sure make you all laugh at me, truly. because i imma be to check my account balance once again. i knew that is stupid action. i just know my blood flowing like ocean at the moment.

" i imma be to check once again"....

" ok , same amount..."

" ok, i can be promote...."

ok.... well, rejoice. sligo immediately came into my mind. just like every bells was ringing for me, the only. i can calm down now. after refreshing my breath, i went back for work.

funny isn't? after i thought back... "why i am soooooo silly..." i don't know. maybe that is the nature of mine.

today, i paid the fee. everything was settle. harmony begins.

for a few minutes........

nite, i keep asking... i should not be promote!!! i should not paid the fee.

because i have only hundred ringgit for me to stay alive before ptptn comes. i totally cant be survive. i cant bear half study half work's day. i maybe die soon. concentrate on study ,i cant work. if i work , i can be pay attention in class.......

so, i decide talk with my mum. i keep ranting, and she is listening.

she said:" okey , i give you 50 ringgit per week for your petrol ...."

she said: " okey, i paid the p1 99rm fee..."

she said: okey, i give you 5rm per day if i dont cook...."

walao e... she only a girl. i saw her hands. because she washes dish in gurney to survive us. and, her hands looked same with my grandmother. i scolded her and i cried. i should let me to promote, u simply must!!!!

" its okey, u are capable to study. why not being promote? "hmm... i speechless. and writing blog here ... its really made me sad,,, very very deepppppppp..making me so irritating!!!

in addition, she just get her salary. but , she gave my little sister hundred rm to continue her private school fee... dear mum, how can you bear us... she so torture herself!!! she ady 40 years old, ady old,legs pain, having hands that look like my grandmother, a pity appearance.... more and more...........

so, did i wrong for being promote in to year 2??? anybody can give me the answer....

and samuel lee brought a bad new today

for all pr student, please prepare to buy digital camera. compulsory!!!!!

more and more,

my communication law tbook that may be use during examination at least costs rm80...

and and and,

two more text books that cost a lot

i m not deciding to buy it....

maybe borrow from library or photocopy illegally...

end

gonna to count goats this whole nitezzzzzz

freeze

ps: away away , ye notes of woe!!! Blow, Blow, thou winter wind!!!!!